Why I Walked – Part 4 – Disbelief

On August 14, 2012, after thirteen years with the same company, I quit my job, with no plan about what would come next. In retrospect it was more than that; I walked away from a career, away from a six-figure salary, and toward something entirely different. Here’s why.  (Part 4 of 7). Missed the start? Rewind to Part 1.

Disbelief

Some of my personal challenges working in corporate America have been around for as long as I can remember. On an off day, when asked “What do you do?” I’d respond nonchalantly “Help banks make more money.” While technically true, yes, I did do that, it speaks to a larger issue – is unfettered capitalism good for all? If you look at the rise of income inequality in America over the last 40 years, and that globally we still struggle feeding the people of our planet – despite having the resources to do so…maybe therein lies the answer.

Reality, perception, and an ideal - and likely a future post
Reality, perception, and an ideal – and likely a future post

I was fortunate to have good managers over the years for the most part. They had a knack for reframing the question of what we did in a positive light and would point out the good that banks can do. Banks help people buy things like houses and cars, pay for college, and start small businesses.  That’s all true, and good can come from this. For loans there is also a catch, a debt to be paid, an obligation. From a global perspective, most of you reading this *ARE* crazy wealthy, check out www.globalrichlist.com for some perspective on that.  Despite this vast wealth we have been well trained to believe what we have is never enough, and seek desperately to keep up with the proverbial Jones.

The Good Book also speaks to this at length. A favorite verse on that is proverbial in its own way, from Proverbs 22:7 says, “The rich rule over the poor, and the borrower is the slave of the lender.” If you just consider common forms of debt, things like carrying credit card debt, having a mortgage, school and car loans, approximately 80% of American adults are in debt to some extent. Slavery, of this sort, is alive and well in these United States. Ouch.

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This is how debt feels to me. *NOT* a fan.
How debt feels to me. *NOT* a fan.

I was never able to fully reconcile this belief internally. In my mind I was working within a system designed to keep people in the shackles of debt. Over time not being able to come to terms with this cognitive dissonance between what I did for a living – and how it can negatively impact society – wore me down.  Fortunately, my wife and I had been working to remove our own shackles, with a plan that offers freedom from this kind of slavery.

Six months before walking from the day job my wife and I hosted a mortgage burning party. At 36 years old we had done it, paid all debts, no car loans, no credit card debt, no student loans, and no mortgage. Part of this was luck; we’ve been blessed with decent education that led to stable careers. Some of that luck is the randomness of being born at a certain place and time, with skills and interests that society happens to reward financially.

...and how freedom feels, me and the missus, with our pastor, and surrounded by friends. Burn, Burn, Yes Mortgage, You Gonna Burn!
How freedom feels. Burn, Burn, Yes Mortgage, you Gonna Burn! -me and the missus, our pastor, and surrounded by friends.

Other parts of becoming debt-free were entirely intentional. We chose to wait later in life to have kids. We set goals of paying down debt, prioritized how to do it, and celebrated each milestone. We don’t live simply, per se, tho we live more simply than many. We dreamed of second careers, retiring early, and just being. When the darkness of depression covered me, there was a viable exit from the pain, one that I understood to be a bad job, of just walking away. Fortunately this walk would allow me the space to get back to living.

Continue on to Part 5 – Resurrection.

6 thoughts on “Why I Walked – Part 4 – Disbelief

  1. Wow! Can’t wait until I can have that mortgage burning party. But in the meantime, my hubby and I are breaking the “stuff” shackles. We quit going “sport shopping”. That’s when you just go out and walk around the mall and buy stuff. We look a little shabby now, but boy, being able to work part time certainly makes up for it! Anybody can do that part, even if they have 30 years left on the mortgage.

    1. Three cheers for the future mortgage burning party Linda! It’s an amazing feeling. That you’re able to work part time by cutting back is awesome, i’m in the same place, grungy clothes and all. congrats and keep on toward those debt-free goals!

  2. Ryan – I was so happy to be a part of that mortgage burning party (I know you can’t tell it by my face in the photo). It was such an inspiration as my wife and I are on the path to freedom as well.

    Great post, I really enjoy the perspective!

    1. thanks man, maybe you were holding a toddler at the time and keeping them from the flames, a good thing! Glad to have helped inspire, keep on keeping on toward your path to freedom, such a wonderful feeling to arrive!

  3. Ryan–Great post. It was great working with you on church council for a few years. Wishing you all the best success in your faith journey going forward!

    1. thanks for the kind words Steve, appreciate it! Yes, enjoyed being on council with you at the helm, good times. Keep on keeping on!

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